An auditor comes calling at night.

As a parent I am restless. I keep auditing myself and my skills of parenting. And like all auditors , I keep finding glaring errors. Was I too soft in allowing him to  play computer games for  60 minutes this week ? Was I too harsh  when i refused to allow him to read the third story book this week ??   Was I barbaric when I forced down the badam milk down his gullet ? Was I  hitlersque in not allowing noodles more than once a month ?

Was I ?

Wasn’t I ? 

What would his reaction be ? What would I have done in his place ?

Whay? Why?

Could I have done this /that in a better way? WAS there a better way?

I was an auditor as a child too. I would point out how better I could have been brought up,That is in MY view ( highly prejudiced  My mother would console me by telling that iItoo qwould get my chance and I could do it the right way then.Now I have  my son saying that i am not an ideal mom !

His ideas  of parenting are quite well thought out-even as a  12 year old.

I am not worried. I am more worried about his ideas of  ’sonning’

More on that soon .

Most often my  auditing is done at night. If I am  tired sleep takes over otherwise auditing takes over the sleep.Many a times my son would have found it amusing that I would be extra careful on some mornings in handing out decisions /orders.He would have expected  the usual  military general barking orders….and he is stunned to see a liberal, ‘cool’ mom accepting his verdicts without a syllable of dissent. Mornings such as these must be  a kid’s dream beginning of a new day.